Cold Weather Jokes

If you haven’t left the house yet this week, you’re probably better off. As I write this it’s currently 5 degrees and “feels like” negative 7 degrees. It’s so cold that, even inside a heated office building, I haven’t taken my jacket off all week. According to the current forecast, temperatures aren’t getting any more comfortable this week. Tomorrow we’re expecting a high of 15, Friday could bring a scorching 21 degrees and Saturday it’s back to 20.

Sometimes laughter is the best medicine, even in regards to the weather. Feel free to share some of the following “cold” jokes with your friends (especially the ones who have been b----ing and complaining about the weather all week on facebook).

It’s so cold that hitchhikers are holding up pictures of thumbs.

 

It’s so cold that Richard Simmons started wearing pants.

 

It’s so cold that UN weapons inspectors suddenly decided chemical weapons might be hidden in Hawaii.

 

It’s so cold, Amish people are buying electric blankets.

 

It’s so cold I chipped a tooth on my soup.

 

It’s so cold that Starbucks are serving coffee on a stick.

 

It’s so cold that when we milked the cows, we got ice cream.

 

It’s so cold that Playboy went out of business. Women are refusing to take their clothes off.