Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
Who Was the Most Annoying Person of 2012?
Well, the year is nearly over, so let's look back and hate on it a little bit. So many, many things were annoying this year. People starting saying "cray-cray" all the time, and for some reason they also all decided it was okay to waggle their chewed up gum halfway out of their mouths on the train. It's not. It's never okay.
Snoop Lion Takes on Santa in Epic Rap Battle
When Santa found out he was going up against Snoop Dogg, er, Snoop Lion in a rap battle, did he soil his red, velvety pants? Snoop Lion agreed to an 'Epic Rap Battle of History,' donned a robe, and played the part of Moses for this video.
Colorado Students Serve Classmates Pot Brownies as Prank
Just because it's legal to do it on your own time in Colorado, doesn't mean you can drug your whole class. Two University of Colorado students in Boulder thought it would be funny to bring pot brownies to a morning class to share. Then a bunch of people who ate them had freak-outs. Suddenly it was not so fun.
McDonald’s Breakfast Burrito Ruined by Pesky Nose Ring
Good news/bad news. The good news is we found your nose ring!! The bad news is that it was in somebody's McDonald's breakfast burrito in Lawrenceville, Georgia. So we might not be eating another one of those for a while, because yuck.
Is ‘Milking’ the New, Weirder ‘Planking’?
We know, you didn't think it would be possible for a meme to be more random than planking, but it's happened. Consider this -- after planking, one is not drenched in approximately a half a gallon of milk. That's the problem you get with "milking," which is basically a person standing in a public place dumping a half gallon of milk on their head while somebody films them.
Facebook Helps President Obama Pardon Two Turkeys
After a neck and neck online competition, President Obama today granted pardon to two turkeys, Cobbler and Gobbler. Cobbler, who likes eating cranberries and listening to Carly Simon, narrowly beat out Gobbler, the corn-eating turkey who loves bluegrass...
The Best of ‘The Prez Is Not Impressed’ Tumblr
Pres. Barack Obama can't just pose with McKayla Maroney, make a silly face, and expect it NOT to turn into a Tumblr. Or, he can, but that would be foolish. The President Is Not Impressed is pretty much just like the McKayla Maroney Is Not Impressed from this summer, only it's the president instead. What sort of things and people is the president disappointed in? Let's find out!
Overly Attached Drunk Girl Video Bombs Newscast
Does the Overly Attached Girlfriend have a sister? And if so, does she like to get hammered in Austin, Texas? We think she might. The girl who video bombs this news reporter looks so much like Laina Walker that it's actually a little bit disconcerting...
The Most Desperate Tweets from Rihanna’s 777 Tour
When it started, it seemed like it was going to be the greatest time ever, but now the journalists who were picked to accompany Rihanna on her 777 Tour have started to get restless. And take of their clothes. And chant protests. And tweet about it. Here are some of their messages to the world, to give you an idea of what's happening. (Read PopCrush's more thorough, but less funny, actual breakdown
Rihanna’s ‘SNL’ Performance Sparks Internet Backlash
Rihanna's performance of 'Diamonds' this past Saturday has angered an internet subculture of "Seapunk" artists, whose style she (along with Azealia Banks, who is also catching some heat) essentially jacked.
Unfortunately for Rihanna, you can't really do anything that upsets anybody without somebody making a Tumblr (and in this instance a Facebook page) by which to mock you. That is exact
Hurricane Sandy Photos – The Amazing Moments You Have to See
As predicted, Hurricane Sandy created one crazy night. Millions without power, explosions, flooding and at least 18 people dead. Don't let your braggedy friends on Facebook convince you this wasn't a big deal. It was crazy. Here are some pics to sum up what happened. Feel free to share your photos in the comments.
The Best ‘Obama Calling’ GIFs and Memes
Somebody decided to post this picture of the president on Reddit, titling it 'My new favorite picture of President Obama.' People went crazy over it pretty much immediately, because Obama's exhausted attempt at smiling is pretty goofy looking. So many great memes came out of this it was hard to pick our favorites, but we tried our best. And the GIFs. Good grief, the GIFs.
See Eerie Photos of New York City’s Abandoned Subway Stations
In case you missed it -- there's a storm a-brewin'! Hurricane Sandy is lurching her way up the coast, heading for us all. Yesterday, the MTA announced it was shutting down trains in NYC at 7 pm and buses at 9pm. Here are some pictures from their official Flickr page taunting us with how delightfully empty all the stations are right now.
The Funniest Hurricane Sandy Memes
Hey there, how's it going? Maybe you're nestled up all snuggly someplace far, far away from the Eastern seaboard, with nary a worry on your mind. The rest of us our bracing ourselves for Frankenstorm AKA The Snowicane AKA Hurricane Sandy. Since it's pretty much all we can think about, here are our favorite memes on the subject. (Yes, many involve Sandra Dee puns.) Because how many weather reports
President Obama Photobombed by Adorable Smooching Kids
It takes a lot to upstage the President of the United States in a photograph, but these grade school kids have done it. We're not the only ones who think so. Even the president himself (or at least his Twitter account) labeled this the "picture of the day." We're pretty sure it's not because of the kid who's trying to eat his shirt. Or the way the president isn't looking at the camera ei
The Best of Mitt Romney’s ‘Binders Full of Women’ Memes
On boy, that was an uncomfortable moment last night when Mitt Romney bragged about having "binders full of women." We wonder if he instantly knew, as we did, that was a creepy-sounding thing to say, and soon there would be memes, memes EVERYWHERE!
Watch Felix Baumgartner’s Jump From the Edge of Space
In case you completely avoided all contact with the internet yesterday, Felix Baumgartner's jump from 128,100 feet about Earth was a success.
Can You Watch the ‘Ultimate Faceplant Compilation’ Without Wincing?
If you think it's funny when people fall and get hurt, you are going to think this NSFW video is HILARIOUS.
‘Sexy’ Big Bird Is 2012’s Top Halloween Costume Unfortunately
Here's one more point against Mitt Romney -- the streets this Halloween are going to be flooded with women in "sexy" Big Bird costumes, thanks to his comments at the recent presidential debate.
Yo, Angela! Tony Danza Raps About Brooklyn
It's hard to imagine this video being any more Brooklyn, unless Tony Danza were to spin two plates with slices of pizza on them and be riding the Cyclone while he did this rap that is really just more of a rhyming list of famous people from Brooklyn...
U Can’t Touch This Obama/MC Hammer Mashup
Remember the "you didn't build that" debacle? It turns out if you take enough of President Obama's words out of context you can make him do a little rap song that sounds remarkably like "U Can't Touch This" by MC Hammer. Bonus at 2:52 -- turns out the president is ticklish...
Best Twitter Reactions to the New iPhone 5
So Apple is releasing a new iPhone (again). It's thinner, lighter, bigger and faster. It comes with headphones that might actually fit your ears. It fits in your hand. It also possesses the ability to explode the Twitterverse. Here's what people are saying.